Loading...
Simply Chic Simply Chic Blog Home

An Expiration Date for Your Marriage?

One guy proposes a time limit for marriage as the cure for divorce. Yeah, good luck with that one.

By Kristin Wong Mar 29, 2012 3:42PM

Photo: Medioimages/Photodisc/Photodisc/Getty Images
If you're married and under the age of 45, there's a 50 percent chance your union won't last. But despite that fact, most people tie the knot with 'forever' in mind. Sure, they might not realize the heft of 'forever', but usually, the intention is: till death do us part.

But Tad Low, a writer for Men's Health, says therein lies the problem. He argues that, because most couples know they've got each other locked down, they stop trying. We know where he's coming from, right? We've all seen the slew of sitcoms featuring a half-assed husband and his hot wife.

But here's where Tad gets controversial. He proposes the concept of "time-limited marriage." Instead of committing for life, each partner has the opportunity to end their 'contract' at predetermined intervals: every three years, five years, seven years, etc. Think of it as a maintenance schedule for your marriage.

Generally, the reaction is…well, here. I'll let this commenter explain:

"Hell no."

But come on; let's hear Tad out. His theory is that a marriage contract would force each partner to try. It would keep them on their toes, making them work for their marriage. Theoretically, it would keep the fire going, and ultimately—prevent divorce.

And if you're really committed to each other, and confident about it, you shouldn't have to worry whether or not you or your other half would want to renew the contract. If there's doubt, marriage might not be the best idea in the first place.

Then again, marriage is work. And where there's work, there are people who want to quit. Perhaps an expiration date on your 'contract' would encourage that. Saying 'I do' means a commitment forever, for all time, for better or—and here's where the work part comes in—for worse. It's kind of a big deal.

Also, the concept sort of begs the question, what's the point? There's always the possibility of being together forever and not getting married. Or am I just crazy talking now?

328Comments
Mar 29, 2012 5:10PM
avatar
Sounds good to me.  I am happily married but I sure respect the rights of others to want to get away from their b-tch wife.  A guy I work with really needs to divorce his wife.  He says, "Catholics don't divorce".  To h-ll with that.  Divorce her and find a different church to go to.  No church is going to stop me from doing what needs to be done.
Mar 29, 2012 5:08PM
avatar
Marriage is a trap if you happen to choose wrong person. Perhaps that may be a good thing if you don't renew you don't have to go through messy divorce
Mar 29, 2012 5:06PM
avatar
Unexamined assumptions and unrealistic expectations. Identify what these are in your relationship (with your spouse, and with yourself)--and the marriage will work.

So many people look to a relationship to "fix" them or make them feel good. In an intimate marriage that WORKS, you get a mirror held up to your face every day. The question is whether you want to face your weaknesses and work through them, if you're willing to be vulnerable, if you're excited about loving unconditionally (and receiving it in return)---if you are then marriage is a phenomenal union.

When you work your marriage, you are accepting the challenge and joy that comes with witnessing every aspect of another person's life, and they yours. How pop culture conveys "marriages," is misleading at best, and unfortunately, this is where many people turn to get advice. No one comes from a perfectly functioning family. We are all learning and growing. When you commit to someone, and they love you warts and all, that's quite a testament to the staying power of committed love and to growing into a humble, compassionate, giving adult.
Mar 29, 2012 5:05PM
avatar
Never married.  But I do have one year contracts with my girl friends.
Mar 29, 2012 5:05PM
avatar
The last sentence of the next to last paragraph illustrates the problem: Marriage "is kind of a big deal."  Marriage used to mean a serious life-long commitment with someone you truly love and with whom you desire to spend the rest of your life.  Now, it's "kind of a big deal" and "work."  This lazy, instant gratification-seeking, self-absorbed and comfort-obsessed society no longer has the emotional maturity or the intellectual capacity to even attempt to honor a serious promise of fidelity.  I would say this is the stupidest thing i have ever read, but this is MSN, I'll be wrong tomorrow, or in 15 minutes.
Mar 29, 2012 5:04PM
avatar
I think the main problem here is that Tad is thinking of marriage as a simple contract.  That may be the case with civil unions, but "marriage" is a religious contract.  Not just with one another, but with God.  I have the feeling that God isn't really down with "opting out" at any interval.
Mar 29, 2012 5:04PM
avatar
Great Idea!  Would probably work better than what we have now.
Mar 29, 2012 5:03PM
avatar
I have been married for 30 year to the same man.  If I had believed every "so called" reason for why my marriage would fail it would have been over long ago.  Marriage is work and it requires a lifetime of sacrifice and commitment.  When we as a society decide to stop "playing house" and get serious about what being married means then we won't need to create timelines for marriage. 
Report
Please help us to maintain a healthy and vibrant community by reporting any illegal or inappropriate behavior. If you believe a message violates theCode of Conductplease use this form to notify the moderators. They will investigate your report and take appropriate action. If necessary, they report all illegal activity to the proper authorities.
Categories
100 character limit
Are you sure you want to delete this comment?

beauty tips and style advice

  • 1

    10 of the sexiest denim campaigns of all time

    Have you ever noticed that denim ads are some of the sexiest? And most memorable? We can’t tell you how many of the people featured on our site, jeanstories.com, swoon as they reminisce about the first time they watched the 1985 Levis’s 501s “Laundrette” TV spot featuring the handsome Nick Kamen—who ended up , ahem, sans jeans. As for print ads, think Guess, Calvin Klein … not only sexy, but envelope-pushing and groundbreaking. If concerned mothers of America are writing angry letters to their local newspapers about the boob-baring models of your campaign, you, as a jeans brand, know you’ve done something right.

  • 1

    The 10 most unforgettable wedding dresses in television history

    From Monica, Rachel, and Phoebe on Friends to Blair and Serena on Gossip Girl, here are the most memorable wedding dresses to grace the small screen.

  • kate
  • Lucky

    Fall shopping, decoded: How to get the most from every budget

    Smart fall shopping can’t be boiled down to some set-in-stone lineup of items. It’s much more about how you play with what you’ve got rather than just racking up a bunch of new stuff; sometimes your bank account’s balance simply won’t allow for a full-on wardrobe refresh. That’s when it’s important to know what’s worth it—and what isn’t.

  • Lucky

    5 fall fashion must-haves

    Autumn’s just a few short months away, and we’ve got sweaters, coats and booties on our minds! Below are the first things we’ll be buying (or have already bought!) to kick off next season.

  • a1

    Cool collective: Fall’s best products

    Beauty editors are routinely asked to name three essentials they couldn’t live without on a desert island. So here’s our list: water, matches, protein bars. As much as we depend on beauty products, they’re not exactly essential to survival. These luxurious fragrances, nail polishes, and tools are no exception. They’re the anti-basics—hardly your medicine-cabinet staples. They won’t shrink pores or obliterate frizz, but they will make you weak with desire. And that’s a refreshing change of pace. Beyond just looking and feeling great, each of these cool new things appeals to our sense of style. How’s that for an SOS?

  • a1

    Flaming lips: The 8 hottest bright lipstick shades

    You could breeze through the rest of summer with the same sheer balm and nude gloss you always wear. Or you could throw caution to the wind and try one of these superfun, superbright lipstick shades we saw on the spring runways. True red, orchid purple, neon orange—these lipsticks are as bold as they are beautiful.

  • a1

    Look now: Cara Delevingne

    To say Cara Delevingne is trending is an understatement: Her brows are a hot Google search term, she has around 2.8 million (and growing) Instagram followers, and it’s a challenge to find a Pinterest board without her on it. She’s the girl everyone wants to look like (and be BFF with, too). Check out her best beauty moments—and pin away.

  • 1

    12 iconic beauties who make the case for the cat eye

    Like red lipstick, cat eyes owe their timeless appeal to their spectacular, style-defining range that can, depending on application, telegraph Old Hollywood glamour, graphic minimalism, or counter-culture punk—what else do Siouxsie Sioux and Brigitte Bardot have in common? It’s impossible to think of Marilyn Monroe without those heavy-lidded bedroom eyes or Amy Winehouse sans her subversive, exaggerated swipe. A mere sweep of eye pencil transformed Anna Karina from a fresh-faced teenager into a French New Wave style icon, and Sophia Loren’s wide-eyed gaze has been forever etched into our collective memory with a frame of perfectly delineated black powder liner. Today, Alexa Chung gives the look a modern ease with a signature liquid swoosh that feels right whether she’s heading to brunch, the airport, or the red carpet. Here’s a look at the best feline eyes of all time. We feel certain that Choupette would approve.

  • 1

    10 unexpected ways to wear pearls From Head to Toe

    Although summer is winding down and days spent by the beach are numbered, there is one gift of the dog days that we can take with us through fall: the pearl. Whether it is dotting denim or lining sandals, the lustrous rarity has become the embellishment of the season and is no longer confined to your grandmother’s jewelry box. For this week’s Most Wanted, we explore how to make your sartorial world your oyster with the ocean gem, along with some of our favorite “pearls of wisdom” to guide you.

  • s1

    Hair how-to: 8 ways to upgrade your bun

    These buns are haute! Pretty twists spotted on this year’s runway put a couture spin on the go-to bun.

  • Plus-size layering tips

    Plus-size layering tips that work for everyone

    It's far too often that "The Best Styling Tricks Evaaarrrr"-type stories leave you at a loss. Sure, if you had the legs of a supermodel and a closet full of designer goods, you, too, could probably pull off wearing a shoe on your head and your drop-crotch pants backward. But, for real life, where looking not-crazy is as important as looking unique, sartorial advice needs to be more tailored to accessibility, practicality, and what's actually flattering. So, yes, this story is titled "Plus-Size Layering Tips," but we're confident these pointers can benefit everyone's dressing game.

follow us
follow us follow us on facebook follow us on pinterest follow us on twitter
buzzing now on msn living
Loading...
about our blog contributors
Loading...
style videos
editor's picks
Loading...