The Groom Translator
When he says: For the reception, I prefer the china with the kitty-cat border.
He really means: Maybe if I pick the worst possible thing that I can find, I'll be off the hook from here on out.
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When he says: It's up to you, babe.
He really means: As much as I love you, I can't even pretend to care about what color shoes your girls wear.
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When he says: The ecru invitation definitely says "classic elegance."
He really means: All of these samples look exactly the same to me...white.
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When he says: Let's dance to "Empire State of Mind" by Jay-Z.
He really means: Let's dance to "Empire State of Mind" by Jay-Z.
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When he says: Forget all of this -- let's just elope to Mexico and sip margaritas.
He really means: You're acting like a bridezilla, and I just want you to be happy.
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