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The Married Chick The Knot the married chick

6 secrets that husbands keep from their wives

Read on as real guys confess the things they don’t share with their spouses.

By The Married Chick Jun 4, 2013 8:17PM
Photo: Men drinking beer // iStockYou might hear the word “secret” and think of something sinister, like hookers, dead bodies or an affinity for boy bands. But, in reality, whatever your man is keeping from you is probably harmless. Read on as real guys confess the things they don’t share with their wives.

The X-rated secret

“I’m into porn.” — Jason

Watching cheerleaders kiss each other isn’t a sign that we’re unhappy with our marital nookie; it just means that we like watching two girls kiss. As Vicki Larson writes in the Huffington Post, “The majority of people view their porn watching as some good, not-quite-so-clean fun.” In fact, according to a study conducted by the late researcher Alvin Cooper, the former head of the San Jose Marital and Sexuality Center, only 15 percent of respondents said their porn watching led to problematic behaviors.


The mother secret
“I never directly say, ‘I dislike your mother’; I just say, ‘We should do something else this weekend.’” — Robert

This is one of those secrets that’s good for us both. What’s the upside to telling you that we kinda can’t stand your mother? Who does this help? Definitely not us.


The friend’s secret
“If a friend tells me, ‘Don’t tell anyone,’ I take that sh#t seriously and won’t tell anyone, including my wife.” — Brandon

If a friend confides in us and swears us to secrecy, we have to treat that promise with respect. After all, we’d do the same for you.


The accidental secret
“Most of the time, if my wife doesn’t know something, it’s because it slipped my mind. With a kid and work, sometimes we don’t have enough time to catch up.” — Matt

So the next time you’re about to scream, "Why didn’t you tell me?!" cut us some slack. We probably just forgot to tell you, even though we meant to.


The harmless secret
“I hosted a gentlemen’s party, and we enjoyed some fine cigars in the house. Forty-eight hours of open windows and scented candles, and no one was the wiser.” — Tom

We commit innocent transgressions — like smoking inside — all the time. We keep them to ourselves to avoid a fight.


The flirty secret
“Sometimes when I’m out at a bar with my friends, I’ll flirt with a girl or two.” — Every guy on the planet

This doesn’t mean we want to act on it. It just means we have a pulse. (And we get that you probably flirt sometimes, too.) We keep it a secret not because we think the flirting is wrong but because we don’t want you to think it means more to us than it really does.

More from The Nest:
What your sleep style says about your marriage
6 signs your spouse is lying
50 sex questions you're afraid to ask

Photo: iStock

83Comments
Aug 1, 2013 2:33AM
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if ur goin to flirt, you don't need to flirt...Why be married? that means ur not happy...with the one ur with..

what happened to morals and values? Flirting is just as bad as having done it with someone..

Jun 22, 2013 3:02AM
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I saw potential and thought maturity would kick in with honesty and respect. I waited too long! (43 yrs.) To all young ladies, and young men, please realize that wasted years can not be regained. If I could do it over, I wouldn't !!!!!! Stuck in stupid.
Jun 9, 2013 12:20AM
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This is an interesting study. I am a Social Science research student who has been conducting various research projects in human relationships. The current study I am working on is looking at the impact of deceptive affectionate messages on the various dimensions of intimate relationships. Basically I am trying to prove that "nice" lying may actually be good for certain relationship. If any you would like to participate, please click the link below. I promise this is not a scam! Thanks.

 

https://www.surveymonkey.com/s/deceptiveaffection

Jun 8, 2013 3:40AM
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Well  I guess a lot of this is right. That said I don't flirt with the ladies. Im 38 and Ive been with the wife for 17 years this year. Ive never cheated, although I caught her cheating on me, Yup found the bat phone. Sux because Ive had many chances but always said no thanks because I love my wife. Ill tell you one thing. Girls these days come hot and heavy. Work and the gym! They are not shy like back in the day.

 Maybe you can love someone too much. I shower her with gifts. Tell her how beautiful she is and support her with whatever she wants to do. After all these years I think that when this happens the other party disrespects you. They feel too safe.

 I would play the game but cheating isn't for me, never has been. Good luck out there guys! I would hate to be single in todays world.

 

Jun 8, 2013 1:41AM
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Umm .. Aren't we overlooking the biggie? All men cheat. There are two kinds of men. Those who admit they're not monogamous, and liars. I know this, 'cause' I'm a man, and I see cheating going on all around me.
Jun 8, 2013 1:36AM
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My husband's secret is how much he spends on car parts, racing gas and what boy toy he is planning on buying behind my back and stashing in the garage where he thinks I won't look.
Jun 7, 2013 11:55PM
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my wife loves porn.... and I love that she loves porn:):):)
Jun 7, 2013 11:15PM
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I like porn but I dont watch no more.
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