Sex on first date could harm your relationship
A reason to keep it at just a kiss?
By Gina Kaufman, Glamour Magazine
The typical urban legend is that sex on a first date won’t lead to a relationship, period. That’s debatable, so a new study has examined what effects, if any, a couple may experience in their relationship as a result of hooking up right away.
And well, it isn’t great. In a study of 11,000 unmarried people in serious relationships, those who engaged in sex before or within the first few weeks of dating had lower levels of relationship satisfaction, communication and stability than those who waited longer.
In case you’re feeling doubtful about those results, it’s in line with earlier research showing that couples who wait longer to have sex have higher marital satisfaction, and the researchers also accounted for other factors that could have affected the findings, such as religion, education, race and number of sexual partners. The results still held.
More from Glamour: 10 turn-ons that aren't about looks
Scientists aren’t exactly sure why delaying sex is linked to better outcomes. They speculate that couples who have sex early may have higher expectations for their sex life, but frequency of sex and partners’ interest in sex tend to decline over time.
But the good news for anyone who just had to have their partner as soon as they met? The effect, while negative, was also a small effect: one-tenth of a point on a five-point scale. It’s probably not exactly a relationship killer.
More from Glamour: 30 sex tips every woman should consider
And as always, correlation doesn’t equal causation: psychologists suggest there could be personality difference between those willing to have sex early and those who choose to wait.
It’s definitely food for thought that multiple studies have shown that couples who wait tend to have better relationships, and personally, I tend to be more comfortable with waiting myself. But there are so many factors that can affect a relationship’s success that I still don’t think there’s any point on getting too hung up about the timing of sex in a relationship.
What do you think? Did you have sex early on in your relationship? Do you think it's caused any problems? Do you even think it matters or is it just different for every couple?
Photo: George Doyle/Getty Images
Bing: Amazing first-date ideas.
More from Glamour:
love: friendship, dating, sex & marriage
Who says a special outing with the hubby has to empty your wallet? These fresh, fun activities require no cash at all, so work your way down the list.
The best method of communication is often nonverbal — your silent actions can have a big impact on the nuances of your relationship. We asked the experts how you can show your honey how much you love him, without making a peep.
Get inspired with these ideas for a fantastic, fun summer wedding!
A pet goat and a skeleton nutcracker aren’t gifts you’d typically receive at a birthday party, let alone a wedding! Brides share with us the weirdest things they’ve been gifted by their guests. No-holds-barred. Obviously, wedding registries are created for a reason!
There is no question the dating rulebook has changed.
It’s finally acceptable to find a girlfriend (or at least a one-night stand) on the Internet. Here are the new rules, featuring the bachelors from Workaholics.
No need to wait for your New Year's resolution to get your love life back in order. Good guys do exist. Here’s the dating advice you need to let go of your relationship hang-ups and start meeting men.
Want to score a date and then a second and a third? Well, here's what NOT to do.
Any single guy or gal will tell you—dating isn't easy. Luckily, there are rules to help guide us along the way. Here are the ultimate dating dos and don'ts.
These pieces of advice can be worked on individually, however, for the most bang for your buck, incorporate them simultaneously and your dating life will absolutely improve.
With all the dating fads that emerge each year, finding love is quite the endeavor. From foodies to furries, here are some of the strangest dating trends we hope don't stay in vogue for too long.
Put an end to casual connections and date the man you're meant to be with — like forever — with this guide from Modern Day Matchmaker Paul Carrick Brunson.