Happy Proposal Day! Should women pop the question?
The times might be changing, but apparently, some traditions are here to stay.
It's long been tradition for the man to get down on one knee and ask for the woman's hand in marriage. But traditions change, social norms progress, and gender roles evolve. So we can't help but wonder — is it time for women to propose marriage? Isn't it OK for ladies to pop the question?
Surprisingly, most people say no.
More on MSN Living: GQ's foolproof guide to online dating
The University of California recently conducted a study about gender roles among 277 of its students. Two-thirds of subjects said the man should "definitely" be the one to propose marriage in a relationship. Only 2.8 percent of women said they would want to do the proposing — and they weren't even completely confident. Those women said they would only "kind of" want to be the one to pop the question.
Not a single man in the survey said they would prefer the woman to propose. And not a single student, male or female, "definitely" wanted the woman to propose.
"Kind of" was as close as it got.
More on MSN Living: Men reveal 7 biggest first date complaints
"No one, not a single person, expressed that type of a preference, which was surprising," researcher Rachael Robnett told LiveScience. She also pointed out that the University is liberal leaning, and the students have flexible views on gender roles.
In this case, tradition wins.
"A really commonly cited [explanation] was a desire to adhere to gender-role traditions, so this is something that is coming through very explicitly, straight from the mouths of our participants," Robnett added.
LiveScience conducted its own informal poll, and we were surprised that only 2.19 percent of readers said the woman should propose marriage. But to be fair, the majority (63 percent) responded: "Either one — it's a free country." Still, 33.92 percent stuck to the tradition that only the man should propose.
Although men and women alike seem to agree on this issue, some refer to this outlook as "benevolent sexism" — what LiveScience describes as, "attitudes that women should be cherished, protected and given special treatment."
A possibly less benevolent argument is that women proposing "castrates men of their last traditional role as the one who wears the pants." As one AskMen.com contributor put it:
"Proposing…is our last vestige of dominance over women. There are more women in college than men, their numbers continue to grow in the workforce and now they want to own us—because that’s what marriage is, ownership."
In that case, neither gender popping the question sounds terribly romantic. And don't even get us started on the college and workforce bit.
What do you think — is it out of the question for women to pop the question? Or does this tradition need a gender transformation?
More from The Heart Beat:
In honor of 'Proposal Day': Engagement by the numbers
Bride and groom adopt new last name
Proposal planners help guys pop the question
Love content like this? Friend us on Facebook, follow us on Twitter and find us on Pinterest.
Photo: National Proposal Day / Tara Moore/Getty Images
I find it incredibly sexy and massively appealing when the woman makes the moves. A relationship should be about balance, if one partner feels it is the right time then they should know [you] well enough to know to ask! Holding back just because of gender makes little to no sense whatsoever.
love: friendship, dating, sex & marriage
-
10 little things that break a relationship
As chore wars rage in the media, we couldn't help but wonder: Can little things like vacuuming actually make or break a relationship?
-
How to reconnect with your spouse
Are you dealing with an unavailable partner? While distance can be a relationship red flag, it doesn't have to mean that the state of your union is shaky. Here, Harriet Lerner, Ph.D., relationship expert and bestselling author of Marriage Rules: A Manual For the Married and Coupled Up, offers 10 simple steps to reconnection, guaranteed to bring you closer.
-
9 little gestures he wishes you'd do
Between soccer practices and school plays, it's easy to put romance on the back burner. Show some appreciation for your man with these tips straight from real guys yearning for a little TLC. By Alexa Tucker
-
How to spring-clean your sex life
Spring has sprung, and it’s once again time to clean out the closets, wipe down the walls and refresh and renew your space. After you’ve knocked out your usual cleaning checklist, here’s a new challenge to consider: Are you up for spring-cleaning your sex life? It’s the perfect time to revitalize your bedroom mojo and let newer, more exciting lovemaking bloom. Ready to get started? Here’s how.
-
5 sexy steps to get out of your date rut
Same old, same old? Put the fire back into your date nights with these tips from relationship guru Rachel DeAlto.
-
7 sexy surprises he'll love
Psst, want to know a secret? Men love spontaneity. It’s sexy, it’s fun, and it ensures there’s never a dull moment when you’re together. If your plan is to catch him off guard and drive him wild, we know just the tricks to try. (Grab those notebooks!) Turn the heat up at home with one of these seven sexy ideas.
