Is kissing cheating? Some men don't think so
A poll shows men have a much looser definition of infidelity.
When it comes to infidelity, men and women can generally agree on one thing—having sex with another person is cheating.
But from there, the definition varies between the sexes.
Online dating sites ChristianMingle.com and JDate.com recently released a report titled, "State of Dating." It included a survey of 2,700 singles, asking them what they believe constitutes cheating. All of the women polled—100 percent—said that kissing someone else is an act of infidelity. However, lots of guys weren't on the same page. Only 86 percent of men agreed that kissing is indeed cheating.
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The differences didn't end there.
Some experts say emotional infidelity is worse than having a sexual affair. Last year, The Heart Beat talked to infidelity expert Ruth Houston, who explained:
"Emotional infidelity will cause one partner to leave the other partner, even if there's no sex involved. That is a situation from which, probably, you will never be able to recover."
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But survey respondents were less worried about emotional cheating, with 77 percent of women deeming it infidelity, and only half of men (55 percent) feeling the same way.
"Most affairs start with a friendship," Houston added. "If an emotional affair goes unchecked, it will become a physical affair if the opportunity presents itself."
Eighty-two percent of women also said online flirting or texting counts as cheating. Not surprisingly, only 56 percent of men agreed.
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Tell us what you think—is kissing cheating? Does an emotional affair as bad as a physical affair?Facebook, follow us on Twitter and find us on Pinterest
Photo: Russell Underwood/Getty Images
I just had a discussion about why cheaters cheat. Some people cheat because they have some un-addressed issues going on. Others need to feel like they matter. They need emotional needs met that have left them feeling insignificant in their relationship. Then there are those that are in a position of power. Their reason ego stroking! They are the great I am and I can have what I want.
Of coarse the grass is always greener when there are no strings attached. They listen to you when you talk, always glad to see you, find time to meet you and cater to your needs emotional and physical. Its real easy to do that for a person that you have no real life ties to. While your out playing, the person you left at home is busy with the children and house hold duties. They probably work outside the home as well. Leaving them tired at the end of the day, With little to no time to play with or pamper your ego.
Have you ever considered coming home and helping to get things done so that you both can meet each others needs. Take time and consider all that we do in a day. Your relationship had to have started out good to even be together. Find out what you can do to get back there. Instead of arguing and pointing finger at each other, do a self analysis and figure out what is your roll in the break down of the relationship.
Find ways to have discussion when your upset about something instead of biting each others head off. In stead of arguing with my husband I email him or text him when i'm upset. That way I can monitor what I say before I send it. Don't let your discussions always be about the wrong they are doing, tell them the things they are doing wright. Let them know you appreciate them, slow down five seconds and give them a kiss and a hug instead of a frown and a growl. Once something is said or done you can't take it back.
Cheater or cheating prospect instead of talking with your cheating accomplice sexy and nice, try doing that with the one that washes the skid marks out your undies. Instead of emailing or texting dirty pictures and naughty notes to the other person, send it to the one that cleans the toilet behind you. No, their job description doesn't sound sexy or enticing but they love you enough to be doing it. So don't you think they deserve a spouse to appreciate them by not cheating. Before you find yourself in a situation that has gone to far take a step back and think about how it would feel if the shoe was on the other foot.
A lot of men don't see online talking/flirting as cheating. My husband was talking to 5 women and even planned on going to see one in florida. When I replied back tot he 4 of them apologized and said that they didn't know he was married and even went so far as to send me copies of their complete conversations. i should have left him at that point but I stayed (my bad) because I never trusted him again. Sorry to say that his infidelity never stopped until the day I told him to leave. The funny thing is I met him online. Now that I am online dating again I have a hard time trusting any BS that is said.
We as human beings need to learn to be direct and talk to one another. This isn't about mind reading or knowing some universal truth where EVERYONE knows what is cheating and what it is not. It's our responsibility to take our relationships seriously enough to at least know what we're getting ourselves into. At least at that point, you will have a reference to go off of should the unfortunate situation arise.
Not all men are cheaters and the excuse that it's human nature for a man to cheat is BS. What's worse are men who cheat then blow a gasket at their spouse who even looks at another guy. Dirtbags are giving the rest of us a bad reputation.
love: friendship, dating, sex & marriage
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