Can Male-Female Friendships Survive Unrequited Love?Can a man and a woman just be friends? Yep. Can a man and a woman remain friends when one of them declares romantic interest and the other one's like "Ehhhh?" Maybe not.
It's the eternal When Harry Met Sally question. Everyone's been on one (or both) sides of this old story before, unfortunately. A study from Boise State University seems to indicate that the answer lies in the depth of the friendship before both parties learned that one was "into" the other romantically.
In the friendships that lasted:
-Both parties continue the friendship and communication levels established before, although many people will shut down after this sort of realization.
-Both parties honestly wished to remain friends. If it's just one of those "Oh, we should be friends, I guess?" courtesy things, it is less likely to last.
-Both parties accepted the feelings on both sides. The lover accepted that the lovee just wasn't into it, and vice versa.
-Both parties saw the friendship as "strong" and "open" before That Conversation, meaning important and emotional things were regularly discussed in a healthy way.
And in the friendships that dissolved:
-The dynamic became awkward or uncomfortable, featuring lack of eye contact and profuse apologies.
-The lovee gave the lover a somewhat ambiguous answer and/or admitted past feelings for the lovee, therefore giving the lovee hope and dragging out the situation.
-The lover continued his/her unrequited pining
Do any of you have guy friends with whom you've had this problem in the past? Did your friendship weather the storm?
love: friendship, dating, sex & marriage
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