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50 Signs He’s Not That Into You

Relationships are complicated, and men are often hard to understand, so how can you tell if a guy is really into you? The following tips will help you decide whether you’re on the right track or wasting your time with the wrong man.
Freelance // Freelance

No PDA

Woman looking at a guy Next Slide

You may not want him groping you on the street, but if he won't even hold your hand or put his arm around you when you're out in public, then he may have serious reservations about you and the relationship.

Video: 'He's Just Not That Into You' Clip: "Hasn't Called"

1 of 51 Photo: Frank P Wartenberg/Getty Images

Just friends

Previous Slide Woman looking disinterested Next Slide

If you've been dating for awhile and he still introduces you as his "friend," it may be time to talk about the status of your relationship.

Video: 'He's Just Not That Into You' Clip: "We Are the Rule"

2 of 51 Photo: Jamie Grill/Getty Images

Let’s do lunch

Previous Slide Couple having drinks Next Slide

You propose a romantic candlelit dinner at an intimate little bistro. He suggests you do lunch instead. Consider that a red flag.

Video: 'He's Just Not That Into You' Clip: "Never Going to Call"

3 of 51 Photo: Nicolas McComber/Getty Images

No answer

Previous Slide Woman looking at her cell phone Next Slide

Everyone gets busy, but everyone also has caller ID these days. If he repeatedly fails to answer his phone when you call, your timing probably isn't the only thing that's bad.

4 of 51 Photo: Frederic Lucano/Getty Images

Cuddling cut short

Previous Slide Couple in bed together Next Slide

If holding you and being intimate after sex now falls somewhere below checking the messages on his phone, watching Letterman, or just falling asleep, it may be time to put the relationship on hold.

5 of 51 Photo: Image Source/Getty Images

Crowded house

Previous Slide Woman looking in a closet Next Slide

If you stay at his place a couple of times a week and he still hasn't cleared closet and dresser space for you, or invited you to stash a toothbrush and some makeup in his bathroom, he may be thinking of the relationship as a convenience rather than a commitment.

6 of 51 Photo: Ghislain & Marie David de Lossy/Getty Images

Last-minute invitations

Previous Slide Woman in deep thought Next Slide

Are most of your dates with this guy spur-of-the-moment? Last-minute invitations may seem exciting and spontaneous at first, but as an ongoing pattern they may be a sign that you're not the first person he thinks of when he's making plans.

7 of 51 Photo: altrendo images/Getty Images

Socially awkward

Previous Slide Woman looking at her computer Next Slide

If you're nowhere to be found on any of his social media pages -- no photos of you on Facebook, no mentions of you in Twitter -- it could mean he isn't ready to publicly declare his interest in or connection to you.

8 of 51 Photo: Brendan O'Sullivan/Getty Images

Dutch treat

Previous Slide Woman paying for the check Next Slide

If he has traditionally picked up the check when you go out, and then suddenly suggests that you start sharing expenses without offering a reasonable explanation for the change, he may be saving up for a new girlfriend.

9 of 51 Photo: Juanmonino/Getty Images

Lack of initiative

Previous Slide Couple Next Slide

If you're forced to be the social director in your relationship because your guy almost never suggests an activity, plans a date or makes it clear that he wants to see you on a particular day, he may be unconsciously backing away because he's not really interested in you.

10 of 51 Photo: Kraig Scarbinsky/Getty Images
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Mynock
Dec 9, 2012 5:23PM
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Love the "Dutch Treat" sign... ladies, if you've got a problem with occasionally picking up the check, then tell him from the start you're a spoiled gold-digger so he knows what he's getting into.

Of course the man traditionally picks up the bill at the beginning of a relationship but as things move forward and you both become more comfortable, then it's also normal for women to start chipping in too, unless you're dating in Beverly Hills or the 1950s...
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8488mustang
Dec 9, 2012 9:21AM
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Number one sign...you're name is Taylor Swift! LOL!!!

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tjway
Dec 9, 2012 4:51PM
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It is true that men and women express themselves differently. But they do express themselves when they are in a relationship with someone they trust. If you are in a relationship with someone you trust and dont feel like your partner is communicating with you, try listening differently.

Although, sometimes its ok to just go with the flo. Sometimes people overthink things to death. It is tiresome. I know women get accused of this a lot, but as a woman, I have to say, I have known a lot of guys who do that too.

Nobody likes to be nagged about what is going on in their head. They are already sharing their life with you. They are already sharing their heart with you. What goes on in a persons head is private until they choose to share it.

Also, my phone is NOT a leash to be tugged.You can call at your whim, but I will answer at mine. Being in a relationship does not take away my individuality.

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Mina and Ra
Nov 25, 2012 10:12AM
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This seems like the psycho-stalker's guide to staying single. I'm a woman & I don't even get this insecure about small things. Women, my sisters you need to relax a little. Seriously.

 

Do you really want a guy doing the opposite of all these "warning signs"? I don't. I'm married & still enjoy my hubby to have his own life too. If he were the opposite of less than half the stuff mentioned here while we were just dating, I don't think we would've gone anywhere if he were so stuck on me. 

 

Clingy people are way sorrier, & to me frankly have more creepiness, than someone who's more aloof or independent. Am I by myself here?

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wraithe23
Dec 9, 2012 3:04PM
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Honestly, I say a lot of these issues is because either party is a fraud. I say this because a women gets with a guy who is so cute so she pretends to like football just to get his attention. People lose interest because a person will eventually show their true colors. I told my girlfriend when I first got with her that I do not like the way people drive, I do not like the way people (more on the women side) dresses, and I hate the way people treat each other. Other than that, I am ok. I am not afraid to try things at least once. I am not afraid to do the things that she likes such as watching girly movies or go singing. Plus I think people put on a face seeming more interesting until they get you.

 

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Mike Kopp
Dec 9, 2012 6:37PM
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A silly article. There is no reason to try to mind read a guy.  Listen to him. Listen to what he says and how he says it.  Stop second guessing him because you are insecure.  Don't use MSN to get relationship advice.
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Danan758
Nov 28, 2012 5:08AM
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come on 23 doesnt count we like to stare so what its a guy thing

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TL W (GenY_with_Attitude)
Dec 9, 2012 10:56AM
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I saw 10 things (thank goodness) 50 is intense!

From experience, I would say you argue more (picks fights to leave), he works out more (wants to look great to the new girl) and he constantly accuses you (guilt).

After all that is said, if he does want out - let him out. It WILL burn at first and if its around your birthday or Valentines - that sucks too! But we all deserve to love and be loved with the same magnitude. If you are still dating and not married - consider it a blessing! Nothing like finding out too late. It make take a while to see the silver lining out of something so terrible but you will find it. Stay hopeful.

Sunshyne

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Yermammy
Dec 9, 2012 9:29AM
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if only someone had told me these signs way back when, before I wasted 8 years on someone who was not worth it!
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wastedpotential
Nov 27, 2012 5:38PM
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If you woke up one morning and saw that one of your legs had been substituted with someone else's, but you were still able to walk the same, I wouldn't expect you to feel a sense of loss or a sense that, although still being able to walk, something's still wrong.

 

Subtle differences or lack thereof define the upper tiers of quality.

 

You sound like an umbrella that surrenders to heavy wind, "poooof."

 

Who knows, maybe a world without expectation is also one without pain, but probably devoid of flavor too.

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GDImatt
Dec 9, 2012 2:09PM
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Why do I never get flirted with all year until christmas rolls around? Been getting many smiles and hellos lately. Coincidence?
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chamberplayer
Dec 2, 2012 2:29AM
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Multi level concepts here. My latest friend is very needy and fragile. I like her as a person, but I cannot risk being responsible for her happiness, or unhappiness. I keep my distance.
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ahumanmale
Dec 9, 2012 11:17PM
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"If he...suddenly suggests you start sharing expenses without offering a reasonable explanation for the change, he may be saving up for a new girlfriend."

I have never heard such ****. What the hell?

It's 2012. If both individuals have an income, there's no reason the man should be consistently cutting into his rent money to wait on a girl hand and foot. Reciprocation and sharing lead to true intimacy.

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Valery Lavrov
Dec 9, 2012 1:31PM
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So many reason to say partner is not loving you .......
So little you done to make it happen........
So much you worry about little things......
So much you do things mostly for yourself ....
So little you ask what your partner want......
So little you think about partner..... 
So many decision made based on self peaty..........
So much you care about how others do.......

So many of as selfish I will say it will never work out....... cause you not deserve it.....
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Vulcann
Dec 9, 2012 12:28PM
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As hard as it is to say, I think I need to move on but I really love this man.
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These claims are the worst yet
Dec 9, 2012 3:32PM
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This is truly stupid, here are the problems...

He doesn't answer his phone because he is busy and you aren't the most important thing in anyone's life at all times...

He looks at other girls.... Please act like if Brad Pitt or your choice of hott guy walks buy and you aren't going to look. Women it is no secret you check people out too. Come to terms with your jealousy and grow up.
 
And that is all I even care to comment on but every one of them were dumb if you meet a guy or girl that can't tell you directly they don't like you or do like you get out.

If you can't ask them directly if they like you or don't  get out, because you aren't comfortable with yourself around them to be honest and real.

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Natalija
Jan 23, 2013 5:03PM
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I had the "Hobbled by hobbies" problem. Apparently, he thought that writing and reading was more important than me. It wasn't his career, mind you. He was studying to be an accountant. So he made room for his hobby and kept taking on other hobbies while making less and less time to call me.
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metalhead2000
Dec 9, 2012 12:30PM
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How about signs that she's a psychotic bitc# ? Now that would really help us guys out a-lot!
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darth twitty (wmsjaldlkfmt)
Dec 9, 2012 12:42PM
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"Sign" 15 could just be that her friends are total C-holes or annoying to the point of pre-meditated murder.
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Thera-P
Dec 9, 2012 5:24PM
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Ladies, if you are looking for a leader and he ain't it, keep looking. ReviveTheFlameDotCom​.
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Wanda Bois (ted590)
Dec 9, 2012 8:19AM
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5 signs ? where , what are they ? What was that 50 things ? All I saw was photos . No words . Rubbish .

 

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