15 (guy approved!) ways to have the best first date ever
Live in the moment
First dates have amazing possibilities. They can blossom into lifelong partnerships, they can be the spark that ignites meaningful friendships or they can end up simply being a few great moments shared with someone of the opposite sex. All of which have the potential to be equally fulfilling in their own way. The end result however isn't as important as the experience itself. So the goal should be to make the experience the best it can possibly be. You can't control what men do -- at least not directly! -- but your actions lie within your sovereignty. Here are 15 Ways to Have the Best First Date Ever.
Bring the real you along
A lot of people are reluctant to be themselves from the outset for fear of rejection. Being yourself from the beginning is the best thing you can do. (This means you should stop thinking about "the kind of girl he'd probably like" right now, and just show up as yourself.) It allows you to find out if he is comfortable with your personality. There may be times where there just isn't a significant spark as a result of conflicting personalities, and that's perfectly OK. The sooner you become aware of this the better.
Vet your candidates
One of the best ways to ensure that your date will be a success is to get a sense of his personality beforehand with a brief phone conversation or through emails or texts. If you're anything like me, you would much rather have your first meaningful conversations in person. That's understandable. However, sometimes just a few text messages can reveal a small sense of who he is and whether the decision to go on a date will end up being worth your time.
Don't leave it up to him
Believe it or not, first dates can be very stressful for men. As much as we hate to admit it, sometimes we just don't know what to do. For us, the ultimate goal is to please you in some way and to make the experience one that causes us to be looked at in a favorable light by you. Help your date out and give him some recommendations. This will greatly lighten his load and ensure there's a mutual interest from the start.
Avoid the awkward car ride that sometimes happens when people try and save the "good conversation" for when they get to the designated destination. By meeting up at a set location you help to alleviate some of the pressure that comes with attempting to make a good first impression.
Want first date magic? Give your expectations the night off! Many times we go on dates with expecting certain outcomes and that keeps us from truly enjoying the moments we share together. Is he marriage material? Does he fit my standards? Will his mother like me? Whoa! These are valid questions, but the answers you seek are found within the interactions you'll have. Instead of trying to shape the experience, simply embrace it for what it is and let it flow.
Skip the bars
When attempting to get to know a person, the less distractions the better. Nothing ruins the mood for him more than being somewhere with you where he has to compete for your time and attention. Unplanned "group dates" are never fun, especially when he is trying to impress you; which he is. He needs to feel like he has all of your attention. This is vital to his self confidence which aids him in his pursuit of you.
Get together early, not late
Getting started early is to your advantage because it allows for flexibility. If you guys hit it off, the early start time will allow you to continue the fun by adding more activities then originally planned. This also helps to keep your options open since certain venues close at earlier than others.
Plan it right
The more prepared you are the better. Think of some conversation starters and some good ways to break the ice before you leave the house. The planning of the date can be as fun as the date itself. Do that part together. This can help get the chemistry going beforehand by creating a healthy anticipation of the time you will soon spend together.
Be open and stay flexible
Life works best when we embrace its fluidity. Make a conscious effort to be flexible in terms of your schedule. Try not to sandwich your first date in between other obligations you may have. A first date only happens once. Taking the time to enjoy it has the potential to improve the experience. When your focus is constantly on the clock, you can miss things, making it hard to get to know him.