He said, she said: 10 dating red flags you’ve probably never considered

He Says: When we encounter a woman who’s hesitant to share her age, we assume her life is on a strict, predetermined time line and her biological clock is ticking. We’re concerned she’ll want to define the relationship after three weeks and get engaged after three months. That’s a pressure cooker most of us would rather avoid.

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She Says: For your own good, just don't ask.

Bing: Why we lie about age

He Says: Bangs say to us that a woman is trying too hard to convey her intellectuality. When we’re approaching women, we’d rather not have to discuss Freudian theory, Milan Fashion Week or the long-term effects of sexual harassment in the workplace. Almost every woman with bangs we’ve ever met has a screw or two loose. Any sane person would realize that bangs are great for an ’80s party but horrible for getting laid.

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She Says: Bangs are hot right now. I have bangs. I don’t have a screw loose or the desire to wax poetic about Freudian theory. And my sex life is fine, thankyouverymuch.

Bing: What bangs say about you

He Says: Women who wear matching outfits to the gym are too concerned with their appearance. Working out is like sex—it’s meant to be a little dirty. The whole point of going to the gym is to focus on improving your body and overall health, and a woman with a matching outfit is too hung up on what others think. We want a woman who has deep confidence in herself, and we’ll bet on the girl who is a little more conservatively dressed.

NOTE: This doesn’t mean we won’t still be creepy and stare at you. We will.

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She Says: Dude, you should feel lucky we’re going to the gym at all. You reap those benefits too, don’t you? And if it takes a cute ensemble to motivate us, why do you care? Looking cute at the gym makes us feel good about ourselves and usually has nothing to do with what men think.

He Says: Cooking has become a shared task in the American household with men expected to contribute. But as far as dating goes, it’s wise for women to demonstrate their culinary chops early in the relationship, as we quickly grow attached to women with cooking skills. Seeing as how most guys’ culinary skills are limited to a microwave and a George Foreman, we’ll be happy with just about anything.

She Says: We’ll concede (and avoid mentioning how very 1950s it all sounds) on this, as long as you agree to do the same for us.

He Says: Pink says to men that she’s immature and potentially clinging to a youthful period of innocence that no longer exists. Immature women tend to be very clingy in the early stages of dating, especially if sex is involved. At some point we want to settle down in a committed relationship, but we also don’t want to be forced to make that decision right after sex.

She Says: We get where you’re going with this, but some chicks just really dig the color pink, and it doesn’t mean they’re stage-five clingers. In fact, often we worry that we’ll have to get rid of all our pink stuff when we move in with a man, so we try to get it out of our system before that happens. Your future self will thank us when you’re not sleeping on a hot pink pillowcase.