24 things no one tells you about being a wedding guest
At a certain point in your life, it will happen every week of summer.
Basically a gas is released in the air and everyone you’ve ever met will get married at the same time.
By Anna Breslaw
And it’s easier to enjoy them than treat them like dumb, obligatory things.
Think of it like a party or an excuse for a vacation! Too many people are grouchy about going, and it’s rude to the couple as well as not fun for them.
A lot of speeches sound the same.
Best man speeches generally include a reference to “Myrtle Beach, 2007, bro, am I right?!” and maid of honor speeches frequently reference Greek Week and end in tears. Both go on too long. Just remember: You’re eating soon.
Show some self-control.
This should be obvious but from experience, it’s not: The half-filled champagne glass set out on your dinner table is for toasts. Do not drink it as soon as you sit at your table. And do not drink all at once because you may have five toasts to get through and you’re supposed to sip for each one.
People’s families are obnoxious.
From unattractive middle-school brats glued to their iPhone to uncles who introduce themselves to your breasts, blood relatives are often annoying when they are not your own.
Except for hot brothers.
Otherwise known as the perk of getting drunk with other people’s families. Because your friend conveniently forgot she had an older brother named Mark who did some Hollister modeling to pay for med school.
Weekend weddings are expensive.
So if you’re on a budget, you’ll end up having to decide who’s important enough in your life to spend the money on. Your best friend from childhood? Sure. The freshman-year college friend you hung out with approximately twice since graduation? Maybe not.
Stick to the registry.
You need to buy them a gift on the registry — and do it fast, before all the reasonable and cute gifts in your price range are taken. Do not go rogue and buy them some patterned salad bowl you find on Etsy because you think it’s cute.
If you buy something off the registry, don’t bring it wrapped to the church/venue.
Send it to their house. It makes your life easier and their life easier. Don't wanna have to carry that toaster around at the reception. It'll block your shine.