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If I Show You Pictures of My Kids, Please Don’t Show me Pictures of Your Dogs

There’s no way your dog is as cute, so don’t even try

By Jeremy Greenberg Sep 14, 2010 12:03PM

First of all, I want to make it clear that I am a dog lover (I actually have a book coming out about dogs in Fall 2011—shameless plug). My dog means the world to me, even if it is a world of following it around with plastic bags. But that doesn’t mean my dog is in any way on par with my human offspring. Unfortunately, there are people who are under the impression that they can hold up their sides of conversations about kids with mentions of what couch cushions their “babies” recently shredded. 

 

I know how much puppy-parents love their pooches. I love my dog. But dog-parents must understand that if we show you a picture of our kids, the appropriate response is, “Oh my God, they’re adorable!” regardless of the photo.  Then, if you like you can say, “We just have dogs” and show pictures of your dogs. By saying, “We just have dogs” you correctly acknowledge that pooches are not on par with human offspring. However, if after I show you a picture of my kids, and you say something like, “Here are my babies” and then force me to look at your old, matted and dreadlocked Irish sheepdog, I’m going to be polite and say, “Oh, how cute.” But what I’m really thinking is that “you didn’t really just compare your dog to my human child, did you?” One day my child will know how to drive a car, your “kid” will merely stick his head out of one—and chances are he won’t even know how to use his paw to hit the electronic window opener.

 

Also, when we tell stories about the cute, amazing things our kids do, don’t follow up with a story about how your dog once got a shoe stuck on its nose. We’re bragging about our children conquering the challenges of physical and mental development—it doesn’t fit for you to then highlight your dog’s incompetence. Guess what, dog-parents, my kids can actually put shoes on their feet. What do you think about that?

 

But please keep in mind that parents do want to hear about your beloved pets. We love that you have a source of happiness and joy in your life. We do want to see pictures of your dog being adorably incompetent. But just know that it’s a bit annoying for you to think you’re holding up your side of a conversation about kids by talking about your dog.

 

12Comments
Oct 12, 2010 6:42PM
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In keeping with the sense of comedy:

A) the dog in the picture is much cuter than the children.

B) my dog never kept me up all night because of his colick.

C) I cannot have children so showing me pictures of your children and bragging about how awesome they are is extremely insensitive and rude.

D) I think my dog is much smarter, cuter and all around better than your common, average human baby who is only developing just like every other common, average human baby.

E) When your baby was 3 months old could she follow commands on queue?  My dog could sit, stay, speak, roll over, play dead and do a "high five" and was completely "potty trained" and eating solid foods by 3 months.  I think that makes my dog smarter than your baby.

 

Please keep in mind that I wrote all of this with a sense of humor and no seriousness intended.  Truthfully I love hearing about kids and their milestones and I love seeing their pictures, but I'll ask about your dog if you negelect to mention her too.

 

Oct 11, 2010 3:25PM
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I do have two children, and a dog (who was my first child while I struggled for years with infertility), and while I know there is a difference (as do most people who have either one), I find this post incredibly insensitive and offensive.  If you think I will be interested in seeing pictures of your "baby," then I would think we are friends and that you would be equally interested in seeing my baby (even if she has four legs).  While the author may not have intentionally been making light of suffering with infertility, that doesn't negate the fact that it is hurtful to those of us who know that children are different than dogs, but are having trouble having children and are letting the love of man's best friend help heal the pain.  I guess, following the line of thinking in this post, if my child was mentally challenged or may not ever meet the physical or mental developmental milestones of a typical child, then I should not show pictures of them either! 
Sep 18, 2010 12:22AM
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i think it's funny. if you have a child and a pet then you know that there is a big difference. that is what it was having fun with and to see it any other way is i think a projection. 
Sep 17, 2010 7:16PM
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if this writer was attempting to be humorous, he failed. there are so many reasons people cannot or do not have kids.  some ppl adopt a dog or 3 and they become 'children.' anti animal ppl will never get that and persons {like this writer} who think having kids is the end-all and be-all of success are missing out on a lot in life

Sep 16, 2010 1:39AM
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I don't think the author was trying to be mean, I just think he is being obtuse.  Just because you think your children are wonderful and cute, dosn't mean everyone thinks the same.  Maybe they roll their eyes when your pictures come out, "here we go again . . . . "

 

If these folks are friends or even acquaintances you'd like to remain friendly with, how about acknowledging that this (the dog) is something in THEIR life that THEY love.  They are trying to spend time and make conversation WITH YOU.  You come across like, "here is my wonderful baby.  Please don't try to tell me about anything else, because it will never compare.  Please be quiet now and let me glory in the beauty that is my offspring."

Sep 15, 2010 7:03PM
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Sounds like it would be a one-sided or very short conversation if the only response that is acceptable would be "Oh, how cute."
Sep 14, 2010 7:23PM
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Open-mouthedSuch a cute article im sure no malice intended toward anyone. We will think nothing but good wishes for the lady that thought the article was mean.
Sep 14, 2010 7:23PM
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Open-mouthedSuch a cute article im sure no malice intended toward anyone. We will think nothing but good wishes for the lady that thought the article was mean.
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